Yes, I've written about my aunt Sharon numerous times before. I even questioned whether I should write about her again today. But of course I should -- she was such an influence on my life. Why should I sit silent because someone else may not want to read about it?
Is there an expiration date on grief? After the first year, should we stop remembering the exact day? The exact place we were standing when we answered the phone? Or is it five years? Ten? Is it wrong to still weep for her sons' loss? For my own pain? Should my anger at the injustice of it all subside over time? I can still hear her say to me, "Hey Em! How's math goin'?" and I wonder if I'll remember again next year. I don't want to forget her -- I'm not interested in reaching the point where I don't grieve for her. Yes, there are happy memories and I rejoice in them throughout the year. But today it's okay to mourn, and I need that.
I'm okay with needing that.
Tomorrow I'll celebrate the birth of the most important man in my life, but today -- today will forever be a black mark on the calendar. I'm okay with that, too. I'm not ashamed to remember a woman that I loved and to cry for her...
And I won't be ashamed next year.
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1 comment:
Beautifully written. I'm remembering too.
Love, Aunt Lee Ann
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